n.b.d.p.s.

Confused as to the title of this post??

That's how I felt when Ben handed me the mail earlier this week and there was a packet addressed to me with those letters on the front. As I opened the packet I soon realized what those letters stood for: National Birth Defects Prevention Study. WHAT?? After much thought and letting the packet sit on the coffee table I've come to realize that it's not a bad thing. I must admit, I was immediately offended when I realized what the packet was about. How could someone send this to me knowing what we went through. The last thing I want to do is think back on our experience and use the words "birth defect." When we think of Weslee we think of our daughter who was perfect in so many ways!! I've picked the packet up here and there reading little bits at a time.. It really is a good thing they're trying to do. They do not know what causes so many birth defects and anencephaly is one of those. I don't know if having an answer to why this happens would of helped or not but if they can figure out how to prevent it I'm all for it!!

There's still not a day that I don't think about our daughter and the "what ifs".. Ben and I would give anything to have our daughter here with us!! In that same breath though we know she is in Heaven surrounded by perfection!!

We will forever have reminders of our Weslee and the short time we had with her!!