Sunday, October 16, 2011

Groundhog Day

Do you ever feel like you're reliving the same day over and over and over again.. I find myself having many days like that lately. My posts are pretty predictable as to what I'll say or what we've been up to. Every time I think to blog I wonder what in the world to say?? I work, Ben works, he goes to school, I clean the house, we both take care of Avery, see family at night many nights, play with our nieces, go to church on Sunday.. Most people have night time activities, kids priorities, parties, go out on the town, etc.. I wouldn't trade my life or what it's become but I do have days when I need/want a change. Ben reminds me often that come December, when he graduates, we can really relax and enjoy life. I know this is true but when the one change comes in the shape of a child, or lack there of it's hard to be content. We've had a hiccup with our fertility clinic and will no longer be doing any treatments or seeing them. I do have a peace about not going back but it doesn't change the fact that our ultimate goal is to have a baby. Sundays at church I feel like every song is directed at me.. trust God, believe in Him, He is sovereign, many blessings, rain drops, faithful. I always feel refreshed and revived but come back home to the same reality. What do I do to pass the time or keep my head up.. pray, talk to God, talk to Ben, cry.. it's such a vulnerable place to be. I truly believe one day we will be blessed beyond our imagination. It's that one day phrase that gets me....

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