So tomorrow is the day I've been dreading since delivering Weslee in October... for tomorrow, March 9 was her due date. I have wondered many times how I would feel when the day actually arrived. To be honest I'm not sure?? I go from happy - sad - mad - proud - repeat!!
It's amazing how much you can love someone you never really knew!!
I wish so badly that I was working, anxiously awaiting when & where my water would break.. I always imagined it happening in the OR in the middle of a case - haha
We know by seeing her that she would've looked like her daddy!!
(I realize I'm babbling and going from thought to thought but that's the emotional roller coaster ride I'm on right now)
I think about Weslee every day so tomorrow isn't all that different, at least I'm trying not to make it. It basically just brings all my emotions to the surface, which I know is normal.
While I'm sitting here typing this I'm wanting so badly to hold our daughter. She's in Heaven without a worry in the world!! I should be jealous of her, not sad!!
I would be lying if I said I wasn't fearful about future pregnancies.. I know the statistics & they're very low of having another anencepahlic baby. But they were even lower with Weslee.... I'm reading a book right now about a family who lost three children to three different causes.. she states, "It's sad how easy it is to learn firsthand of God's love, care, and provision and then turn around and momentarily forget it all for the sake of fear."
"God hath not given us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind." (II Timothy 1:7)
"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your request be made known unto God, and the peace of God which passeth all understanding shall keep your hearts and mind through Christ Jesus." (Phil. 4:6-7)
I ask that you say a special prayer for Ben, myself, and our families... we're so lucky to have such a great support system, not only in each other & family but with wonderful friends!!
We're truly blessed!!